Where's my confidence?

Y human's mind full of "Why" and "If"?
Or in fact there are no one mind's full of "Why" and "If"
and just only my mind full of that two words.
I always think that if pass two years my health is good and
not always MC, MC and MC!
Will I still stay at thr and work?
Yesterday, tried to drive out during night.
I was very tension and scare...until i can't do it.
I really very mind about that...
Maybe for others ppl they will feel juz a small matter
Y need so mind about it?
Juz becoz of tat's a small matter, tat's y I very mind.
Until my mind pop many many and diff diff of "Why" and "If"
till i slept in midnight 1oc and I need to wake up early 6oc in the morning
to prepare myself for follow mom go work and afternoon's 2nd interview.
2nd interview really make me feel no more self confidence, what they offered me really low.
I adi din sleep well somemore get impact like this really no more spirit.
Feel wanna cry but I din't but blame myself in heart => EMO
Actually no use to EMO like tat, juz look for other job.
I know...juz look for other job.
But everytime interview i really feel stress, coz i dunno the location and parent too care about me
At last they bring me to the interview.
Sounds very nice rite? This age still got parent bring..
I feel happy but if can i prefer i going to interview by myself...
Cause i dun wan to troublesome dad and mom....